peace at last

[Only Me]

I wrote this a long time ago shortly after my mother went to jail for some poor choices... I dont know if any of you will understand it it was kind of like my letter to her... I got pulled for years and I think I finally found a peace
A peace that allows me to know that I will be alright
It tells me that I did the right thing
A peace I have looked for and long for
I still feel like something is missing
A piece of my heart is gone
I am still unsure of where it went
There is a large gap in my heart
I think it is where I held you
My love for you has not changed
It grows for you everyday
And so does the hate for all the things you do
No matter how hard I tried I could not seem to get you to stop
I wish you would lie down your pride and accept my offer to help
I thank you for giving me life
But with that life you handed me pain
And with that pain you gave me freedom
The freedom allowed me to gain power
And I took that power and made some choices
I won’t tell you they were all good choices
And one day I know you will forgive me for them
But for now, try not to hate me
And I will try not to repeat history

[Absinthe]

[glow=black,2,300]I really liked this piece. It was so full of emotion and I can relate, especially to this:

"I thank you for giving me life
But with that life you handed me pain
And with that pain you gave me freedom"


Sounds like my relationship with my parents, more prominently my dad. I'm not about to say that I know exactly how you felt writing this piece, because I can't possibly feel the same as we all experience things differently. But I will say, that I get it. I think I understand a bit of what this means. Great job. [/glow]

[Only Me]

thanks, I was going through a rough time because I had turned my mom in for having drugs in the house while my little 5 y/o sister was in the house... my entire family hated me for it, especially my mom.

[Absinthe]

[glow=black,2,300]You shouldn't worry about that. They just couldn't see that what you did was for the best. Sometimes, people only allow themselves to see so narrowly and side with someone they love so dearly that they don't take any time to think about their reactions. I'm sure that they didn't actually hate you. They were probably shocked and a little afraid of your courage to do what you did. I commend you for that.[/glow]

[Only Me]

my family eventually got over it but my mother still hasnt.. the other poem that says my mom died... she only died in my mind, but the rest of it was my life story... I claim to be an orphan because I was emancipated when i was 17 and my mother denies ever being my mother...

[Absinthe]

[glow=black,2,300]I would claim to be an orphan as well, were I you. I'm sorry you had to endure that. I hope that things have brightened at least a bit since then and that you have been able to move on. As I always say, "someone willing to forget you is someone who never deserved to have a space in your heart". Cynical, I know....and quite pessimistic, but it has gotten me through some tough times. [/glow]

[Only Me]

They are words to live by, and so far I have been. I am a bit of a pessimist though...

[Absinthe]

[glow=black,2,300]Pessimism is needed sometimes to squeak by in this world. I think we are all pessimists deep down soemwhere, some of us just show it a bit more than others. [/glow]

[Only Me]

so true...

[Laura]

"It tells me that I did the right thing
A peace I have looked for and long for
I still feel like something is missing
A piece of my heart is gone
I am still unsure of where it went
There is a large gap in my heart
I think it is where I held you"

--I thought this was really well shown. Quite powerful too.

[Only Me]

thanks.