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Post by Absinthe on Aug 7, 2006 17:15:33 GMT -6
Walk wearily Through sandless hour glasses Skipping precariously Along the bridges of time Kiss the sky On your ascent And sing sweetly In saccharine tones Of regret
Bleed truth And ingest lies With hunger
…….hunger……
Hunger pangs.
Drift away Upon oceanless shores Hiding from sight In plain daylight view Gun down power As you fall And forego apologies For more violence And harm.
Tears fall Begging forgiveness With hope
……..hope……
Hopelessness.
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Post by Laura on Aug 8, 2006 20:21:54 GMT -6
I really enjoyed these lines: " In saccharine tones Of regret" --I love the word saccharine and tones. Wow, two great words together. I'd really like to hear this spoken out.
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Post by thecrazybeautiful on Aug 9, 2006 6:32:56 GMT -6
I like
"With hunger
…….hunger……
Hunger pangs"
and
"With hope
……..hope……
Hopelessness. "
Reading those parts aloud with the pauses in there sounds so put together... If 'put together' is really any description at all. I like the images of the hourglass and the shore as well.
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lanaia74
Contently A Distraction
Posts: 32
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Post by lanaia74 on Nov 30, 2006 13:40:09 GMT -6
Totally AWESOME!
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Post by Absinthe on Jun 2, 2007 21:02:48 GMT -6
Thanks for the comments. I actually wrote this as spoken word. I was sitting in my backyard one day with a journal and kind of started talking to myself and this is what was put down on paper.
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