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Post by thecrazybeautiful on Feb 5, 2006 13:32:07 GMT -6
There's a name reference in this one, but the whole thing isn't about him. I meant it to be, but when I read it to myself, I realized it wasn't.
Untitled
I.
You brew like a storm in a witch's cauldron.
Cast your spell on me.
You've had me spinning for many long months. Dizziness is spelled
J-O-N-A-T-H-A-N.
II.
A float isn't a float without coke and . . . . . . two straws
III.
I'm not a heavy breather.
You steal my air when I can't decide whether or not to look at you.
IV.
You're like a cold shower, leaving me shivering.
I step away to be wrapped in sheets of skin. Not you, not ever,
but someone you could never be. Someone I'd still choose you over.
V.
The sun says "Girl, get over it. I'm the only star you need."
The moon says "It's not your fault. Dream, and let it be known-
you love him."
VI.
A straight beats a pair.
The jackpot: your heart.
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Post by Laura on Feb 6, 2006 10:40:20 GMT -6
" A float isn't a float without coke and . . . . . . two straws" --I liked this ... it's sweet. I love floats with root beer " You're like a cold shower, leaving me shivering.
I step away to be wrapped in sheets of skin" --gorgeous statement. " The sun says "Girl, get over it. I'm the only star you need."" --okay where did you come up with this one? These are the kinds of lines where you say "man, I wish I wrote that" ... brilliant! I really enjoyed this and I liked the format.
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Post by thecrazybeautiful on Feb 6, 2006 15:19:44 GMT -6
How did I know that somebody was going to like that sun part? Lol.
I dunno how I wrote that part. It was kinda an idea I had in the back of my mind, but I could never find the right poem to put it into when I wrote. I'm glad to have finally gotten it out.
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