Christmas Hurt

[Laura]

a/n: this needs some revising, I think ... I was having difficulties with the ending.

Christmas Hurt

I haven't hurt in days
because the pain just slips by me
morning coffee doesn't sing like it used to
the notes are all smudged
like chocolate on a three-year-old
"I was once young,"
I say as I pass up another cigarette from a stranger

I have finished all my Christmas shopping
the ones that are tagged with familiar names
just need boxes and ribbons
for the children with no faces
that cry filthy tears because they've got no clean water
and I'm wondering,
should I include a letter?

I pack in more violence
moreso than a 14-year-old boy running on nothing
but playstation late night TV
it's freezing, so damn cold the hair on my arms have froze
but the cold -
it doesn't seem to stop the salty, yet tasty, flow dripping out my eyes

I forgot to kiss my husband goodbye today
when he reached for the door handle
should I be ashamed he's slamming the girl next door?
how can a man be so wrapped up in warmth at home
yet go out to spark a fire somewhere else?

I haven't spoken in days
the presents surrounding the Christmas tree speak enough for the both of us
and I won't be singing carols on Christmas eve
because I can't remember the words,
and I won't be sending gifts to the third world
because I can't seem to feel anywhere else
but I will be smiling tomorrow morning
because I haven't hurt in days.

[allmeheart]

very interesting story you've told w/in this poem, i think the third stanza should be revised though

[Laura]

Yeah, I don't like the last line in the third stanza ... it's too long

[Only Me]

I love it. great job! I cannot stand Christmas because I cannot afford to feed myself let alone others and while I know that my going hungry is severely different from others, I still feel bad when I have food and a roof over my head, I have done nothing to deserve what i do get... you know what I mean?
ok back to the poem. great work... I really have no complaints, the first time I read it I didn't understand how the 4th stanza fit in... but then i re-read it and it made sense...