Chrono
A Devoted Distraction
It as the at point which we think we know the most that we truly know the least.
Posts: 228
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Post by Chrono on May 30, 2007 14:27:15 GMT -6
I was not sure exactly where to put this poem, but I figured it fit here. I do not have a title for this poem, but anyway here it is. Ethereal light streams forth from the sky Whispers flow forth on the tips of a stream The deaths long ago permit one to cry Forever, tomorrow's past is a dream
Forests sway to the coming of a dawn Birds sing, and once again the river brings Life lives, breathes, and then eternally gone To be born again in the coming springs
Glimmers now sparkle forth from the ocean Vibrant lights dance, reflecting the new day Time slips away, brought back with a notion That even the past is seen in a ray
Twilight holds the essence of air and light Life falls dormant as the day turns to night
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Post by Absinthe on May 30, 2007 17:00:16 GMT -6
I didn't like this stanza;
"Forests sway to the coming of a dawn Birds sing, and once again the river brings Life lives, breathes, and then eternally gone To be born again in the coming springs"
........just didn't sit well with me. The rest, I like. Nice flow and pure rhyme. Nice job
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Post by NotSoPerfect on Jun 1, 2007 14:26:20 GMT -6
I thought it was very illustrative and not too overdone. Overall, I liked it.
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