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Post by Laura on Aug 13, 2006 18:47:53 GMT -6
A/N: not sure of the ending ... ?
On the Side of the Sun
When the sky is angry with me, I can tell I am sure that one day the sun will disown me too Say, “Hey lady, You’re covering too much Earth You gotta go, you gotta go”
It splinters my insides to think the clouds are watching me thinking of how much meat I eat when is it too much, enough I can never tell when the lights go out
The moon stops looking and I’ve lost track again.
OH just look at the colours all blue and pink and soft peach one look in my direction and in comes the black and red I only wanted to be a part of something special
But this Earth is just too good for me
JUST like my mother who left me last 4th of July because I was setting off the fireworks too early in the kitchen, in the living room where Uncle Joe was sitting and too close to his eyes and I’m on fire
it just gets her eyes flaming even if the orange has died
and JUST like my brother who said I was too secretive yet when the cops had asked me where he’d been all night I said “arrest him, he’s a nuisance” Just because I needed sleep
now he’s still pissed and I’m still alone.
When the sky is angry with me, I know The way the colours wrap around each smile and strike right through me leaving nothing but a trail……
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Post by Absinthe on Aug 13, 2006 20:33:47 GMT -6
I liked this.
"But this Earth is just too good for me"
......This line seems so...hopeless. It instills a feeling of desperation when reading.
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Post by thecrazybeautiful on Aug 18, 2006 7:16:44 GMT -6
I don't know why I like this. Maybe it's the sarcasm when it comes to talking about the family, or maybe it's the feel of fear almost that comes through when talking about the sky. It just seems to story-like, and... I don't even know.
"The moon stops looking and I’ve lost track again."
Those are my favorite lines.
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grifter
A Devoted Distraction
Posts: 135
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Post by grifter on Dec 9, 2006 0:56:36 GMT -6
i like your use of contrasting colors
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