someone to be saved

[suicidetank]

The Heartless

how simple this day can be
well at least from what i can see
rising out of bed clearing my throat
scrathing my head
well time to take my place in the day
could i possibly feel any more tired
do some coke and get wired
spending time idly at work
afternoon comes around
while driving through town
I get scolded dont really care
maybe i'll get a wench on my way home
god i could really go for some
poison rips through an already damaged valley
drowning out all thought take my place on a couch
pluck some strings but nothing comes out
ive screamed away my mental health
all this week has been hell i guess one more
wont hurt or so i said and now i sit here
watching him speak but hearing feeling nothing
concerns falling onto the dead and heartless

this was written because i feel this is how this person lives his day im the one who is talking to him

[Sharon]

[glow=Purple,2,300]sounds like this man needs a vacation seriously though, life is too short to live it miserably. this is an interesting piece, thank you for sharing Vinny ;D[/glow]

[allmeheart]

revise it other than that, great

[Samccaleb]

^ I dont understand revising it. I think its good as it is. There is thought and emotion in it. I think is really well written. Keep writing. Good job.

[Only Me]

scrathing.. scratching, idly... idley, ive... I've dont... don't, wont... won't simple revisions... but yes they are needed...