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She
Apr 8, 2006 10:16:44 GMT -6
Post by Laura on Apr 8, 2006 10:16:44 GMT -6
her wings are violet torn from folding too much over time stands still when she's flying
diamond eyes twinkle sun setting at a midnight when the clocks are turned she's still flying
glass hands and magic wands ceramic heart ready to break too fast too slowly all at once in a moment
she soars - she's flying but she flies no more.
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stupidxgirl
A Devoted Distraction
So You Sailed Away...
Posts: 229
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She
Apr 8, 2006 13:42:32 GMT -6
Post by stupidxgirl on Apr 8, 2006 13:42:32 GMT -6
It certainly wasn't my favorite by you but I did like a few parts "her wings are violet torn from folding" I love using the color violet, I thin you've done it before I'm not sure. But it's such a strong color. And wings beings torn from folding is a nice image. "glass hands and magic wands" I love, with a passion, this line. Glass hands is such an awesome idea. Like I said, wasn't my favorite but was still a nice read Good job.
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She
Apr 8, 2006 14:01:24 GMT -6
Post by Laura on Apr 8, 2006 14:01:24 GMT -6
it's a work in progress ... I meant to state that, oh well, haha!!
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She
Apr 8, 2006 14:42:06 GMT -6
Post by QueenPaige4 on Apr 8, 2006 14:42:06 GMT -6
well it flows well and it does seem like it was a work in progress anyway but its good so far
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She
Apr 10, 2006 7:49:38 GMT -6
Post by thecrazybeautiful on Apr 10, 2006 7:49:38 GMT -6
"ceramic heart ready to break"
Very interesting image.
This is pretty nice.
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She
Jun 23, 2006 23:59:39 GMT -6
Post by Only Me on Jun 23, 2006 23:59:39 GMT -6
ok this may sound strange, but as I was reading for some reason my mind took to its own volition and read the beginning really slow and the middle really fast up until the last line and the lst line was slow. I am not sure what its called but I went to this "slam poetry" concert? thing and they all recited poems in different rythyms and tempos and it was like to a beat... I don't know if I am making sense. Anyways, this poem reminded me of one of the ones that was read that night. i really enjoy going to poetry readings, that way you really get to see the writers emotion behind their words and it seems so much more real.
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