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Post by Laura on Mar 2, 2006 21:07:32 GMT -6
Her arm was stitched His hand was cold Spear for a neck Hate bred love fool Just sick in the head He wanted her He would have her near His fingertips long and worn A potion now To cure all his soul has torn Teeth shark like Stapled to his roof Bite down upon her neck Let the blood run in Begin like vampire sex He is a sin She is a victim Her legs are broken But he loves her His tribal heart has spoken And this zombified love Will break all hearts Who dare to speak badly of it Because he is the Demon King! And he’ll rip the bones right from your skin
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Post by Only Me on Jun 24, 2006 0:13:02 GMT -6
oh wow. "Who dare to speak badly of it Because he is the Demon King! And he’ll rip the bones right from your skin" those lines will probably give me nightmares for a week. but I love this poem. it has an awesome concept.
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Post by thecrazybeautiful on Jun 29, 2006 8:31:32 GMT -6
"Teeth shark like Stapled to his roof"
I really like that.
This reads to me like the silly scifi movies that are so awesome to watch. They don't really scare you (though the people in the movie are scared) but they really make you go "Whoa that's cool!"
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Post by Sharon on May 1, 2007 16:56:37 GMT -6
Hate empowered creature having an ability to love... interesting concept - "And this zombified love Will break all hearts" ...that part almost looks like an oxymoron-type phrase. Dark and gorey - just how horror should be. It's not every day you see this in poem-form though, thanks!
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Post by The Brutal Immortal on May 1, 2007 17:09:40 GMT -6
this is good, i like the demonic theme, i cant think of much constructive criticism that helps, so ill end it here
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