|| Rotting In Despair ||

[allmeheart]

[glow=black,2,300] “Rotting in Despair”
Spiders crawling around
Cobwebs cornered in your mind
Heart wrenching memories of us decaying over time
You call your attic home
A place to lock yourself away
Safely hidden within the dappled gray
Something so mysterious
About the darkened soul
Your disguised within the shadows
Yet still urging to be let go
You’re bound to me no longer
We’ve gone our separate ways
You’ve traveled up the stairs
And into your private room
Where dust coats the creativity
That once beckoned to shine
Have you forgotten just how to move on?
How to get on with your life
Well then gather your spellbound self
And come take a walk with me
Back before me and you became ancient history
Back then when you were knocked off your feet
You’d bounce up again, unharmed
Yet now you take one or two licks
And forfeit as you infect your wounds
Failure for you was never taken lightly
So how do you feel now?
Its time for you to open up the window
And let Luna’s beams burst through
Caress that ivory skin of yours
And you can start anew
Be thankful for this lesson
Be glad I truly care
Otherwise I could have left you
Rotting in despair

~Jessica~ [/glow]

[Laura]

"Something so mysterious
About the darkened soul
Your disguised within the shadows
Yet still urging to be let go"

--I really liked this stanza ... kind of a more subtle rhyme here, which made it flow better.

"Where dust coats the creativity"

--I liked this line as well ... it seems too often people's emotions overshadow their talents.

The ending was fairly nice as well. The only thing I would suggest is keep a rhyme pattern instead of just rhyming when it's convenient. Yes, that makes it less forced when you do rhyme and yes, people have pulled off unattached rhyme schemes but it didn't work here. Good job though ;D