To Try Even So

[Chrono]

Not exactly sure if I'm finished yet. I leave it as work in progress for now, but here's what I got so far.

To try so hard
To do everything right
To find the answers
To every question in life
To search for an unknown
To find who we are
To look beyond tomorrow
To keep the past in sight
To face hardships
To stand up when we fall
To take second chances
To go for it all
To learn from mistakes
To be a better person
To live a better life
To smile when we cry
To live when we should die
To help everyone we know
To be happy forever
To know it may not be possible
To try even so

[allmeheart]

An enjoyable read. At first, I was a little put off by the repetition, because sometimes it takes away from a poem, being so redundant. However, I think you kept the flow well enough that it worked. If you get what I mean by that. Only one line didn't sit well with me "to look beyond tomorrow" I think that threw off the flow a little there but you brought it back. Since its in the middle the only suggestions I would have is to either add something before it to make it ease into the line or maybe revise the wording a tad. Message drifts a little afterwards for me, I get hung up on things too easily I suppose.

~Jessica~

[Chrono]

Thanks for the comment. I changed around a few lines, so maybe that fixed some of flow issues though I couldn't think of a quick fix for the line you pointed out. Maybe something will come to me later.

[Absinthe]

I actually really didn't like the repetition of "to" starting every line - it definitely retracted for me. Then I read it again, eliminating the first word of every line. I really think it sounds better as a whole without the "to"s.