Does this make you feel good?

[xxrebel86xx]

Swimming in this sea,
Of lies and dissect,
I'm almost drowning.
I'm not getting saved,
But I'm being pulled down,
Deeper into the dark water.
The darker the water,
The deeper the lies,
The more I hold back,
The less air I have left to breath.
Does this make you feel good,
To drown me in your lies?
To drown me while I look for help?
Or does it not matter,
That I'm drowning,
Deeper into this dark water?

[Laura]

The idea is good ... I think with a little revising it would be nice. This is one of those poems you keep and years later you can go back and spruce it up.

[QueenPaige4]

AGREED

[psiloveyou]

I enjoyed that. This has some serious potential. Very effective wording.