tommy
Wishes To Be A Distraction
Posts: 10
|
Post by tommy on Jul 20, 2005 7:00:58 GMT -6
Truths shadow
Things you say when you don’t say a word.
Silence observed as an unrelenting curse.
Expression and emotion
meaning the same thing.
One shows the other.
The other never to be seen.
Honesty lost on the young and the foolish.
Honesty is weakness
for you to be exploited
A word meant well can kill just as easily
as a word said in prejudice,
or a name called with ill feeling.
Guarding before the guard goes up.
Never your self.
Life is never enough.
Why would it fit the bill of a happy ending?
No such thing.
Just raw pain unrelenting.
|
|
|
|
Post by Absinthe on Jul 20, 2005 9:37:59 GMT -6
I really liked this.
"Why would it fit the bill of a happy ending?
No such thing.
Just raw pain unrelenting."
That line leapt from the page and tapdanced across my desk. Excellent job
|
|
|
|
Post by haley13xoxo on Jul 25, 2005 17:39:12 GMT -6
i love the style of this poem
|
|
|
|
Post by Sharon on Jul 25, 2005 18:41:06 GMT -6
[glow=purple,2,300]i loved how you made the beginning of the poem connect with the end. you stayed consistent with your words and nothing in it seemed out of place. good job  [/glow] |
|
|
|
Post by allmeheart on Jul 28, 2005 19:41:03 GMT -6
I really liked this. "Why would it fit the bill of a happy ending? No such thing. Just raw pain unrelenting." That line leapt from the page and tapdanced across my desk. Excellent job amen. lol |
|
|
|
Post by Laura on Nov 29, 2005 20:52:49 GMT -6
" or a name called with ill feeling.
Guarding before the guard goes up.
Never your self.
Life is never enough.
Why would it fit the bill of a happy ending?
No such thing.
Just raw pain unrelenting." --I loved this. I can't really say much more about it. I just happened to really enjoy this piece of writing. I don't know if the poet still comes on here but I hope so |
|
|
|
Post by Only Me on Dec 4, 2005 1:20:29 GMT -6
"Honesty is weakness
for you to be exploited" I don't like that line... I guess, honesty has never been a weakness for me? Being honest has always been something that took strength... I had a horrible life and had to force myself to tell the truth about my life, it took me years of therapy and a wonderful foster sister to make me finally open up and tell my true story... Lying is what exploited me... ? thats just me though... great work on this poem!
|
|
[/glow]
